What a whirlwind few days I’ve just had. Kieran’s wedding surpassed all of my expectations and I’m still reeling from it.
Friday was the day I was to leave for Gorey in Wexford to meet my friend Kieran. He and I have a long history together (read about my previous visit to Ireland for more details) and he had asked me to be the best man at his wedding. Of course I jumped at the chance and was honored to accept. Now that the day had arrived for me to travel, I was still waiting for confirmation of what train I should take to accommodate his and his fiancé Aileen’s schedule. They would need to pick me up from the train to get to their house.
With all that was going on for them, it was pretty hard to stay in touch. I had tried calling Kieran and sent him a Facebook message but it met with no response. By the time I heard from him, he suggested I take the 6:30pm train which arrived just after 8. So that was all settled. I was kind of glad I was leaving later in the day because I just wanted to take things slow.
I decided to take the train rather than the bus because my (and Linda’s) wedding present to them was a large framed print of one of my photographs. I didn’t trust the big luggage bay in the bus because I couldn’t keep my eye on it and also I thought if there was a bump on the road, the glass might shatter. The train was a much better idea.
My mom took me to the train station which is near the city center. As we approached, we noticed hundreds of people heading for the same train station. What the heck? This is Sunday, I thought, where’s all this foot traffic coming from? Turns out there had been a hurling game in one of the big stadium parks and it had just finished up. Everyone was heading home. We knew Dublin were playing but we didn’t know their opponents. My mom and I looked at each other and thought they might have been playing Wexford. Great! Thousands of people going for the same little train as me.
We had to go a long way up the road and past the station before we could get turned back around again to deliver me and my bags. Finally out of the car, I elbowed my way into the entrance hall of the gigantic Connelly Station. There were huge stone steps up to the main concourse and I wanted to avoid that. I was carrying a sizeable suitcase in one arm, the large framed picture wrapped a million times in the other hand and a very heavy backpack filled with my camera, lenses and laptop.
I spotted an elevator so I pushed the button. I wasn’t sure if it went to the main floor so I decided to find out. A seemingly gentle old man was standing beside me so I said “Excuse me, does this elevator go to the main concourse?” He looked me up in down as if in utter disgust and said “I don’t fuckin’ know, I’m just goin’ for a drink!” Alrighty then, thanks for the help. I swear, every second word uttered by people in this country is fuck. (Apologies to those offended).
I got on the elevator anyway and it did bring me to the main concourse. When I walked out on the floor there was buzzing all about me. I looked around in a daze for the ticket counter and all I could see were ATM-like machines that required credit cards. I wanted to pay in cash so I needed some kind of face to face communication. I spun around some more. Ah, there it is right in the corner, I thought. I shuffled awkwardly in the line with all of my luggage. When I got my ticket, I found myself sandwiched in with no clear way past the sea of people. “Eh, excuse me missus, sorry now, sorry….yeah, lovely, thanks now and gobless…” Finally away from the crowd I found my way to the platform and relaxed. I relaxed because there were only a handful of people on the platform. It turns out the game was between Dublin and Tipperary, which is nowhere near Gorey. Whew! Now I didn’t have to bash people over the head in an attempt to get into the train.
My train to Gorey awaits me.
They began to board 30 minutes before the scheduled time of departure and I found a seat at the end of the carriage with room between it and the back wall…just enough room to slide the picture frame through and be able to keep an eye on it at the same time.
My ticket to Gorey!
It was a pleasant sunny evening and the train ride was a scenic one although I wished I had found a suitable seat on the other side because the view of the coast was much better from there. I wasn’t about to move, though, so I just enjoyed the ride.
When I got to Gorey, Kieran was nowhere to be found. Some habits never change. Kieran was always late for events when I was with him in New York. In all fairness, though, both he and Aileen were running all over the place with last minute wedding errands and he also had a paying gig to prepare for that night. He arrived about ten minutes after and we hugged and were soon on the way to his house.
It goes without saying that it was great to see him. Last time it was just an overnight stay and it was over before it really began. This time I was staying through Thursday so it would be a good chance for us to catch each other up on things.
Aileen was at the house when I arrived and she greeted me warmly even though she was busy with wedding details. Kieran was getting ready to leave momentarily for his gig. I wanted to go see him play, even though this was just a hotel gig with him playing covers of other bands’ music. Didn’t matter t to me because I was happy to be there and excited to see and hear him play.
We arrived at the hotel and he quickly set up his gear. He was playing solo so it was a pretty basic setup…a PA and guitar amp and the guitar. Add a microphone, a mixer and a chair and voila…ready to go.
Kieran is a hard working musician. Gigs like these are essential to him for making a living playing music. It’s not ideal to be playing other people’s music but it does pay the bills. Most of the time, patrons are not even paying any attention to the music so it can be a little thankless. On this night, however, he got plenty of participation from the audience.
Kieran "on stage" at the hotel the night I met him.
I ensured Kieran was stocked up with his alcohol needs and he began the set. It was great to hear him play again. He has something special that I have only heard in a handful of musicians in my life. He ran through some numbers by Steve Earle, Johnny Cash and even Elvis and then he spotted a local man that actually used to be a cabaret-style singer in England. He and Kieran had done this before so he was not stranger to getting up with Kieran to belt out a few songs. He sounded great. In fact, he sounded so great that some others in the audience wanted to participate. Oh great, I thought. Kieran gave me that knowing look. A couple of other people got up and sang. One was good, one was potentially good. What I mean is, she started off sounding really good with the opening bars of “Shout” but then she really was shouting but, with a little training and constraint, she could probably be a contender.
This lady was belting out a few bars of "Shout".
When we got home, we stayed up for a little while listening to music until we felt like we were keeping Aileen awake so we shut it down and went to bed.
I had learned that evening that Kieran and Aileen were to be married at a registry office on Monday morning so we had to be up and out the door by 8:30 to make a 9:00 appointment in the little town of Enniscorthy. Aileen got dressed up but Kieran just kept it casual. I was going to be there as an unofficial witness but mainly to take photographs and document the event. Aileen’s parents would be there as the official witnesses and it would be a good opportunity for us to meet pre-wedding.
Kieran and Aileen on the way to the registry office.
With Aileen present, it was easy to get there on time. Aileen’s parents rolled in around the same time and we headed to the office. The door to the registry office was locked even though it was now a little after nine. Within a few minutes, the registry lady arrived with wet hair. She looked like she had just stepped out of the shower. “Ah, how are yiz? Sorry to keep you waitin’… can you give me another few minutes?”. Talk about casual…we went back outside and I took some group photos and a few of Kieran and Aileen.
The lucky couple with the bride's parents.
The process of acquiring a wedding license and just getting married in a state capacity is quite sterile. We were all squashed into a tiny little office and the lucky couple were told to repeat a few words, sign along the dotted line and, all of a sudden, it was all official. They were married! I never imagined Kieran to be married. He didn’t seem like the type but here he was, all married there in front of me.
The whole gang at the registry office.
Next on the plan was to have a “wedding breakfast” hosted by Aileen’s parents. We headed over to the house while her parents went into town to pick up a few things. When we arrived at the house, Aileen and Kieran got to work starting the breakfast cooking. Anyone who has tried to do anything in an unfamiliar kitchen knows how much of a challenge the simplest task can be. They spent half the time trying to figure out where things were kept and the other half figuring out how the extractor fan worked. None of us were able to solve the fan mystery so they cooked without a fan. Soon things got pretty smoky, especially from the bacon and, all of a sudden, the smoke alarm went off. I just laughed. I thought to myself that this was a good test to see how they both worked together.
Aileen made jokes about this scenario being a conspiracy between her and her parents to see how Kieran would fair under pressure. I think he did so with grace…not flinching once, he continued frying up the eggs and pudding. Aileen’s parents opened the front door as Kieran was plating everything. Nice timing Mom and Dad. I have to give Kieran and Aileen kudos because a lot of people would have just sat around waiting for their parents to come home but they both took the initiative and got the job done.
This was to be a busy day of logistics and last minute running around for the wedding. On the agenda after breakfast was to move the vast quantities of beer and wine from the sauna out in the garage to the cars by the front of the house. This is wasp season in Ireland, especially in the Southeast where we were. They were everywhere, hundreds of the little buggers and I am allergic to their stings so I had to be really careful.
One of the cars that was packed to the gills with booze.
We managed to squeeze everything into the three cars and soon we were on the road again. Before we went home, Aileen wanted to visit with her 95 year old paternal grandmother. Unfortunately she was not well enough to attend the wedding so Aileen wanted to see her at the nursing home before the big day. I was hoping to get some photographs of Aileen with her grandmother but I didn’t want to suggest it in case she didn’t think it appropriate. Kieran and I stayed in the car while Aileen went inside. She returned after about ten minutes and asked if I would mind taking some photographs. Of course I didn’t and I was excited to try to capture at least one photograph of the two of them talking to each other.
She was a strong and beautiful woman in her youth and she retains both of those assets still but her mind wanders and it’s hard for her to retain information. She was told on a number of occasions while I was standing there that Aileen and Kieran were getting married the next day and, each time, she reacted like it was the first she had heard of it. A lovely woman but sad she couldn’t be with everyone for the wedding. I took some photographs and, when Aileen introduced me to her, she looked at me and asked if I was “taken”. When I told her I was married she said, “ well, I guess I missed my chance!”. That made me laugh and then we said our goodbyes and sped towards home down the narrow and winding country roads.
Aileen and her grandmother share a moment.
Aileen was finishing all the little bits and pieces up. She went outside in the garden to cut flowers for the tables while Kieran heated up some stew that her mother had given us so us boys wouldn’t starve. Aileen was going to be staying at Ballybeg House, the wedding venue, that night with her mother, maid of honor and three bridesmaids. Her friend arrived to take her there and in minutes they were gone….
Later that evening, Kieran and I met up with Aileen again to help unload the beer from the cars and also ensure that everything was set up for the stage show taking place directly after the wedding dinner.
Most of the couple’s friends are either actors or musicians so we were going to be in for a grand night of entertainment. The wedding program read like a music festival. Three hours of music from some of the premiere musicians in Wexford and Dublin.
Ballybeg House is situated in a valley in Wexford. It is surrounded by the signature fields of Ireland, with many shades of green and gold. As I took a break and stood by the fence overlooking this vast vista, I felt almost overwhelmed with its beauty. Horses and sheep slowly meandered through the fields chomping on the grass.
Ballybeg House the night before the wedding.
I felt raindrops on my head until the sky opened up to a heavy downpour making for a muddy mess. The rain continued through the night but the forecast for tomorrow’s big event was supposed to be good so we were all going to pray for a little bit of sun.
Aileen's attention to detail was second to none.
But the night was still young. Aileen’s dad was playing at the same hotel Kieran had been the night before and he asked if we would come support him. Aileen’s brother Jonathan and his girlfriend Birgit live in Kieran’s neighborhood so we stopped by to meet them and Birgit drove us to the hotel. As midnight approached, there was no sign of a move towards the car. I reminded Kieran that tomorrow was his wedding day and he had better get a good night’s sleep. After much persuasion, we got home and were in bed by 1:30am.
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